Ask For Help

For a agelong time, I took a batch of pridefulness successful ne'er needing to trust connected different people.

I americium a conflict-avoidant people-pleaser, truthful I would often pridefulness myself connected NEVER allowing myself to trust connected others. I surely wouldn’t fto myself load personification other pinch my struggles.

I jokingly shared really I felt about ​asking for thief nan different time connected Instagram​:

I would gladly thief others without a 2nd thought. But saw it arsenic a characteristic flaw for myself (and ONLY myself) if I asked for help.

I believed that this was 1 of my strengths: figuring everything retired connected my ain and being disposable to thief everybody other but NEVER asking others for thief aliases guidance.

I’ve travel to recognize really silly – and harmful – this mentality was. And I’ll drill nan constituent location successful 2 wholesome ways.

Asking For Help is simply a Sign of Strength

Lord of nan Rings has been astatine nan beforehand of my mind for nan past week.

Season 2 of Rings of Power precocious started (and early reviews are saying it’s a marked betterment complete Season 1, which has maine excited!).

I besides listened to a 3-part bid astir The Lord of nan Rings on the ​What Went Wrong? Podcast​. It covers really this trilogy came to life, conscionable really galore things had to spell right, and what a monumental feat it was bringing Tolkien to nan large surface successful specified unthinkable and cinematically superb fashion.

Thinking astir Middle Earth and Lord of nan Rings reminded maine of 1 of nan memes that ​inspired maine to commencement therapy​. If Aragorn, nan manliest man ever (okay he’s Numenorean and part-elf, but you cognize what I mean) leaned connected his friends…maybe it’s okay for maine to thin connected others for thief too.

Asking For Help is simply a Super Power

While I reflected connected penning this newsletter, I stumbled crossed a video that brought a monolithic grin to my face.

Powerlifter/personal trainer Sherein Abdelhady was filming herself doing dense deadlifts successful a commercialized gym, and a random dude approached her betwixt sets and asked 1 of nan astir wholesome questions I’ve ever seen successful a gym interaction:

“Hey this is simply a weird request…but tin you thatch maine really to deadlift?”

His petition was polite and respectful, and Abdelhady was much than happy to help!

As a result, this feline learned really to deadlift from personification who knew overmuch much than he did successful that area! And now this feline will person a amended acquisition (and astir apt prevention himself from injury) for nan remainder of his life doing this unthinkable exercise.

What a ace power! Props to this feline for being a existent human, and recognizing that asking for thief and being unfastened to learning is simply a freaking superpower.

I’m utilized to seeing videos of women who are approached by jerks who connection unsolicited proposal aliases mansplain (with unspeakable recommendations) to women who are acold much knowledgeable than nan jerk..

So this was an unthinkable flip of nan script. I emotion it.

Asking For Help (One Last Thought)

I’ll time off you pinch 1 last thought earlier I inquire YOU for a request.

When I inquire for help, I person a inclination to travel it up pinch “I beryllium you one.”

This ​thought from professor Adam Grant​ changed my perspective:

I emotion this.

I person to extremity myself EVERY TIME personification helps me, and alternatively of saying “i beryllium you one,” I simply convey them. I cognize that I would gladly thief them without expecting a favour successful return. I thief because it’s nan correct point to do!

Here’s my mobility for you today:

Is location a portion of your life wherever you’ve avoided asking for help, trying to fig it each retired connected your own?

Can you reframe this successful a much useful way? One that sees asking for thief arsenic a motion of intelligence and spot – not weakness.

Can you scope retired for thief today, and NOT opportunity “thanks I beryllium you one” and alternatively conscionable salary it forward?

Ask for help! It’s bully capable for Aragron, and this nerdy dude successful nan gym…it’s astir apt okay for you too.

-Steve